Growing up, I was always a follower. When I was in grade school and we were assigned a group project, I would sit back and let the others call the shots. I was afraid to step on anyones toes, I was afraid to have my ideas shot down and I was afraid that I would mess things up for the group. If you haven’t been able to figure it out by now, I’m kind of a nervous person. Going through high school, I stayed a follower. I never wanted to stand out too much because the brighter you shine, there are always more and more people that are going to try and put out your light.
When I got to college, I really started to learn that if you didn’t stand out in what you are doing, you aren’t going to go very far in your life. Much to my chagrin, I had to step up to the plate. I started working in the Audio Visual department at Westminster during my freshman year: I could not have been more blessed. I learned that I like being responsible, I like fixing problems and I even like being relied on by my fellow co-workers. With two and a half years experience under my belt in AV, I’ve gone from the student assistant position, the assistant media library manager position, the media library manager and now the operations manager. I flicked some kind of switch in my head. It’s almost like I realized what I can do and I am ready to bat. I’ve stepped up to the plate.
This summer, coming to the eCenter, I was nervous of being the underdog. Before we all started I would think to myself, “I’ll just fly under the radar, I’m sure there someone is going to take charge”. But then I walked through the door. After making an instant connection with the other interns I knew I could be myself and not be afraid to speak up and give my opinions. I’ve gotten really comfortable here and I keep stepping up to bat and getting on base. Its a pretty good feeling. The problem, however, is how do you lead when you are in a group of leaders? I’ve started to step back from the plate a little bit, afraid of getting hit by the ball. I don’t want to step on anyones toes, but how do you stop doing what feels so normal?
Being a leader in a group of leaders is definitely a new adventure. We are all equal and we all have to work together or nothing will ever happen. I think we’ve found the rhythm that we needed and I think we can only go forward and succeed. Although I think it has been a challenge and I haven’t always known how to handle being a leader, sometimes it’s really helpful to be able to look to other leaders and that is what I can do with my fellow interns. Its great to not be nervous, to be supported and supportive and to not be straggling behind the group. We are all on the batting order and we are all hitting home runs. Leader board, here we come!